How To Satisfy a Customer (Without Really Trying)

As listed in my latest Buzzfeed article, there are many different kinds of customers. Some are friendly, and you won’t mind spending an extra minute chit-chatting with them about the price of Easter candy. Others are, well, less so, and will probably be the ones waving their receipts in your face insisting the sign said Buy One, Get One.

Either way, all species of customer are customers nonetheless and you are therefore required to afford them a certain level of respect. But that doesn’t mean you can’t streamline the process of serving them a little bit. The following is a foolproof guide to getting the customer in and out in a (presumably) satisfied manner.

The best part about it? You’re so good at serving customers, you should be able to follow the steps without even trying.

  1. Smile.
    This is so simple an action that it should almost be a reflex. Don’t keep looking down at your group chat when you see a customer approaching from the corner of your eye. Look up. Make eye contact. Be polite.
  2. Greet them with enthusiasm.
    Stitch- HI
    You’re already smiling (hopefully), so take it one step further. Make them feel welcome. Exuding positivity will hopefully incline them to do the same and may even soften them up if they’re coming to you with a complaint.
  3. Ask how you can assist them.
    This is what you were hired for. This is your purpose. You got this.
  4. Brainstorm solutions to their problem/answers to their question.tumblr_inline_nf63gqlCSh1s2q864Most times, there are a few different ways you can solve a problem for a customer. The approach I take involves making things extremely easy for pleasant and friendly customers and saving lengthier processes for the Unnecessarily Rude. Ethical? No. Temporarily therapeutic? You bet.
  5. Assist them quickly and efficiently.
    Do not follow the steps of my aforementioned method. You are a well-oiled customer service machine. Change your Twitter handle to @QuickandEfficient to let everyone know how good you are at your job.
  6. Thank them for their patience.
    82954-thank-you-gif-Phil-Dunphy-thum-UQ0FNot all answers are quick fixes. Sometimes the customer has to stand there and wait for you to call the Head of the Floral Department who has to page with the manager who is—you guessed it—on a conference call for the next half hour. If you’re bored holding the phone to your ear just imagine how they’re feeling.
  7. Smile (again).tumblr_m6roaz9EaX1r5t6t1o1_500Oh, come on, it’s not that hard.
  8. And repeat.

Psst… are you more of a visual learner? Check out the infographic here.

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